Saturday, July 5, 2014

Words can hide, feeling can't ~

It have been a long time that I could seat down, taking a break & relax my mind,
The precious moment that could keep you go even further in future.
What's important in your life?
How well can you manage it?
How well can you balanced it?

I got some reflection & I felt that it is important to share:

1. Being a tanker
We all like to help people, we always think certain small little things are easier if you were just do it yourself without troubling someone

In long term, because of that you are going to make yourself tired
Please remember that you are not a robot
Share your load, help one another even small little things
Not only things can be done few times faster, it will also build a stronger relationship among your colleague

After some times, I realize that we can have different friends
But it is best to treat everyone differently
Draw different type of "standard" between different person
People got two stages,
One is before knowing you,
Second one is after you became friend
Third stage is when you guys get closer
Everyone will be nice at the first stage & second stage
But after you came to the third stage, things get complicated that you wouldn't figure out why,
Who they really are, what they really want

So I have come to a conclusion 
If that particular person manage to enter to stage 3 of your friendship & you found that they are bothering you, affect whatever you do & create unhappiness in your life
Please remember ....
Send them to stage 4

A stage whereby you need to juggler around different stages at different time
That is why the most complicated things on Earth to handle is relationships between one another
And never let these type of people know too much of your things

This word it might be easier to spell it out with just five letter
But this word "trust" is a problems among the people
It was an incident in the camp when I was a Signal IC,
Before exercise I pass a set of signal set to the instructor
After exercise, the instructor told me that the signal set have pass to another department
There was a Signal IC in that department too & I went to ask him if they have taken our equipment
He was so confident that he say "NO"
Me, with the mindset of, no one know what happened or whats going on
Except that particular person own up
Problem is sometimes they themselves don't know the answer
So I noted down the S/N & I scan through one by one of their equipment
Guess what... I found that exact signal set in their department

So now goes, how much can you trust even if they are an officers to be?
Never forget if you have a responsibility to do something then make sure you really do what it suppose to be 
Worst thing on Earth is sometimes people don't know what they don't know

Give people respect & don't keep on making fun of the people if they have done a silly mistake.
Never ever ever talk bad behind the people back, you should look more into their good points
And never ever ever look down on people, instead you should help that person
That's what it suppose to be

Bear in mind that even people disrespect you, 
Shall not make you into a person who disrespect back to them
Always remember who you are & be who you are
Never ever let others forget who you are

5.Being Hot tempered
I always feel that I am the peaceful type of person
But until recently I found out that people words, small little things that they do
Easily got me pissed off, easily got me angry
Maybe I was once a peaceful guy that no one will make me angry,
But I realize that this wasn't a fact now

No matter what happen 
Just remember what you do
Never let that few minutes of anger ruin your future

I realize something in me or maybe in everyone
There is always that few minutes of moment somehow don't know what's going on
That you are super inspire to do something, want something very badly
But when you wake up the next morning you realize that your energy of inspiration of doing that particular things drop to zero

If you are inspire at that moment
Just do it, 
If you can, do it & make it more achievable

7.Being a Blur King
There was once someone told me this,
"You are an idiot, why must you do all these sort of stupid things & make people remember for life?"
This line got me reflect & it will always remain in my mind now

What I feel, I always denial & come to a conclusion that
Why I am like that basically is because I am not very interested in it
Therefore I always look blur, not being alert

But it must change, I must excel in everything I do
That's what it is suppose to be

8.Low Self-Esteem
This is the one I feel that it is bothering what I am doing, who I am
Whenever I did not do well in certain things & people use that to tease me
It got me "down" & whenever that topic starts again
I became pessimistic & felt that I am a failure in my life

From now on, people who ever tease me in the mistake I done 

9.Convert your joke to a lesson learnt
I will never forget what I did during Brunei that I fire off one blank at the last hour of the assessment that got me not to able to have that JCC Badge
I will be posted to BMTC & I always worried that the new recruit will ask me
Why I didn't get my JCC Badge
And I doesn't know how I should answer them or maybe how I should lie to them
Because peers feel that it was a joke to them & it is a disgrace of being an officer for making such mistake
But instead of feeling that
I finally came up with a solution,
That's to make it a very serious matter, create a lesson process for them
So that they will remember what are the proper steps handling their weapon for their entire life
And not to make the mistake I made

It will be the biggest disgrace to yourself 
For not admitting what you had done wrong
Making up stories, hiding up everything & make yourself like you are perfect wouldn't get you far
Be proud of making mistake now then to make mistake in future
Learn & overcome it

10.Being paranoid
I always worried & worry for whatever things I do
I am just afraid that I couldn't do it
Couldn't success in it
That got me low confident & low morale to do what I need to do

This make me look bad
This create nothing but unhappiness in whatever I do
I have decided & tried
I will always tell myself I can do it
I will make it
Never allow Pessimistic to come into your mind
Terminate it immediately before it goes on further

Everything must not be over do or neglected entirely
It is the best to always balance in everything you do
Let's say about capability & ability
If you are capable to do it then just do it
But when you are not capable then you should do something about it
And not keep doing it like how you usually do
You need to be flexible & make changes anytime

Do not compromise too much in whatever things you do
If you keep on compromising, the other side of it will accumulate more problems 
And the problem will never be solved

12.Lies or happiness
This have been revolving in my mind for very long....
Will you lie to create happiness for the others?
Or you will choose to be honest & make the people sad?
I have been thinking this for very very very long....
So I came up with this conclusion.

If lie were to create happiness without affecting your future, please do
If lie were to to just create temporary happiness & accumulate disappointment, then PLEASE STOP

So now I faced a problem,
I wanted to create happiness, I doesn't want to accumulate disappointment
I am having a hard time to balance between my ability & capability 
And I doesn't want to lie on my capability for the temporary happiness & create disappointment regarding my ability
So what should I do?
(Still thinking.......)